And in the song Walls by up and...erm gone band, All Time Low; Who have recently received a lot of airtime. The opening verse goes a bit like this, at some point: "Take off your shirt, your shoes, those skinny jeans I bought for you."
And I'm thinking if:
a) I had them on in the first place
b) Someone asked me too.
then I would happily do as the man says. 'Cos I'm not one to rock the boat.
So in a moment of quarter life crisis/self-reflection I decide to buy some shirts some shoes and some skinny jeans...for myself. And so I log onto a UK (Nondescript) store, punch in my credit card details and add a few items to my basket. And after about forty minutes and three hundred pounds I've finally reached the checkout.
And if this where a real store, right now I'd be asking to have these items gift wrapped. But its not, so I don't. And instead as a little treat I opt for 'Next day delivery(Order Before 1400)' and it's actually 2034, and whilst I wait for about three days for these items to arrive I am simply going to pretend that time only exist for people who worry about it, and they usually don't have much left.